I have found love before, She was a beautiful trans woman but she didn't know it yet. She was there, beried deep in her sole, but the world could not yet see her. She had just started her transition and HRT when we met, but was not living full time as a woman. She had some hurdles to cross some confidence to find and needed a hand to hold as she gained the strength to jump them. I became that hand. Watching her blossom from the beautiful woman she was in her heart, from the beautiful woman I just instinctively saw from day one into the amazing and confident woman she is now, and is still becoming was an experience like no other. An experience of such overwhelming honor to have been a part of, I am forever a changed man myself. I grew along side her as I needed her hand as much as she needed mine. I have trust that the love we shared will one day find me again and I will have another hand to hold and more strength to share and grow from. I need this and I want this. True story by the way and we are still friends. 

I know who I am and who she showed me I can be. That I can love and be loved and that is a gift I will never be sorry for. Or regret. I want that love again. I meed that love again, and I know it is out there somewhere. maybe here maybe not, but I am willing to try and find out. I owe a debt of gratitude and need to pay it forward. Are you out there? I that I don't know, but if we are not willing to take chances in life and risk the pain of a broken heart we will never know. The pain will fade but the lessons and strength will live forever as it does within me. Am I pathetic lost soul? that is not for me to judge, thats your job. I can only try to be the best person I can be, I hope that is good enough. I am far from perfect but who isn't